white trash or talent: driving, 1 hand on the wheel, 1 holding a cell phone & talking & smoking without using hands..in an old beater pickup..
Both
im trying to catch a child molester. call you later.
It's like my work doesn't even care about margarita mondays.
Apparently my gaydar only works on americans. Frenchie capris has two topless chicks in our kitchen making him breakfast.
Romer got arrested for getting in a bar fight with a bus boy because he was trying to steal a keg, had it all the way to the car
People said that when they tried to talk to me I answered that there was a glass around my head stopping me from answering them
get back quick. that 17 year old who peed on your car wants to do shots.
Aaaand I cut your bangs with a large knife last night ...
And I'm only telling you that because I really wanted to use 'my boyfriend' and 'dick biscuit' in the same sentence.
Since Josh is going to be Carl Sagan for Halloween, he bought a turtleneck and sportsman jacket. It's all my nerd fantasies come true.
Like did I tell you about the ex Amish guy? Because that was a mess
I would give a kidney to fuck him and he knows it. That bastard.
I just got a robo call from the Addiction Help Line. Not sure how to take that.
I serenaded the cat in the hat for a few 90s songs but idk who he is
He asked me how many starwars references he could make before i no longer find him attractive.
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