To answer your question of whether I "went back," tits just informed me I was kicked out for falling off my barstool and passing out on the floor...
Remember that time I came into your room after taking a muscle relaxant and we argued about what state has the longest coastline?
don't look now, but that cross eyed girl is staring at you... and me.
You were in the bathroom for two hours practicing "Revenge Faces".
When we woke up, I asked if we could play "what does your name rhyme with".....he said 'bave' thank god it was easy
You're surprisingly coherent for someone who thinks her couch is breathing.
I'm glad we are bonding over both contracting clamidya. Winners.
100%
Solid. Can't put a price on good times
You can and it's called a liver.
I'd go lesbian for $50 and a good phone case.
I feel you. We can get adjoining rooms. It'll be like Disney world, but with drugs and ivs instead of roller coasters and Mickey Mouse.
Which is way cooler
They won't let me buy alcohol in the airport until 9am. Super judgemental
Day two of not drinking, I think my cat is trying to eat me.
Psychosis secondary to sobriety???
I had sex upstairs in my parents house, and my mom texted me and said "those raccoons are out of control in the walls."
Ya, It's probably because whenever I close my eyes I see a kitten playing a banjo.
I'm classy like audry Hepburn. Chugging wine out of the bottle on the way to the club. Shed do that. I know she would.
Randomize
