Your parents are going to be so confused in the morning
More like pissed. but ill be sure to explain my pathological fear of terrorists hiding in the bathtub
I wish i could be there for it
I am midnight drunk by noon
Ya know, years from now when that kid is old enough, I'll get to regale him with the story of how I was his father's AND uncle's first gay experience.
I had to photo shop your nipple piercings. that was extremely awkward.
THC water in my coffee on the way to work. How's your Tuesday?
Just saw a huge group of people walk by in there in their underwear. Too stoned for this.
he said verbatim, he wants to "bang you hard".
Taking Gomer to the ER. He tore something trying to stretch his nutsack enough to put his balls in his own ass. I need new friends.
You made her yell her own name while you were fucking so that you would remember it in the morning.
I'm treating this like a real date. My boobs aren't even out.
I'm so proud, I have tears
So... I woke up on a bench with a honey bun on my chest.
Does me being hung over take away from how professional I can be today?
I HAVE DISCOVERED LONDON AND IT FILLS ME WITH JOY
Ok next time we are filming it. You bring the camera and I'll buy more socks
Don't come in. My door to my bathroom won't close because of the table and I'm pooping
Classy
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