This cougar at my work just said "big breasts" referring to poultry... Still resulted in a boner.
I want Jason Statham to talk British to my vagina.
You told her the u were going to wrap your dick around her neck and start her like a lawn mower. thats why she left.
it's just like freshman year of high school, with more drugs
i woke up naked with 27 half ripped $ bills in my bed from ripping them off the wall of the bar
george bush was a better president for first pitches than barack obama. there. i said it.
He was carrying a rolled up carpet saying he was saving it for tomorrow's Walk of Fame.
he came in the shower with me...i thought it was going to be nice and romantic...until he started peeing on my leg.
I think they called the cops after 15 minutes of you shaking their clothes line like the ultimate warrior and calling out hulk hogan
someone made her a trophy at 4 in the morning and presented it to her in the bathtub
Sometimes I love sober logical me. She makes rare appearances but when she does she shines.
It's national "dress up your pet day" come over. Drugs and dressed up cats..it's the shit dreams are made of.
I want the address of the individual responsible for strawbeeritas. I want to send them gift basket.
Maybe snorting K off penises isn't healthy
But once you are just right and I work my tongue in the right spots and hot wax your balls and inner thighs. I will have you right where I want you.
Who is this?
Oops wrong number
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