White coat. Heels.
He sang nursery rhymes to my vagina to get me to have sex with him..
Just for the record its a bit awkward when you introduced me to your friends at your house as your brother and then insisted in front of them that I sleep in your bed with you
She said "oh yeah" like Hulk Hogan with the muscle flex and everything. Totally digging this chick
I am the slutty bisexual glue that holds this friendship group together.
the straight edge chick smoked with me, because according to her my bowl is pretty
I just walked past a guy banging a chick in the back of his car.
Side note: the physics of a guy my size and age getting laid in the backseat of a Toyota Camry are absolutely staggering
He's super sweet. I feel like I'm dating Elmo. If Elmo had a 7 incher
Did you put Dave Matthews band on the playlist? It's really hard to funnel when "Crash Into Me" kicks in.
That moment when a stripper is the one that makes the two of you have to define the status of your relationship...
He was telling me how he was trying to grow up. And then 2 minutes later, he told me he was tripping on lsd for the first time.
I'm 22 and I'm drinking hawaiian punch from a sippy cup. Everything is right in the world.
Omg I got up from his bed and almost did a header into the wall because I came so many times I forgot how to walk.
I just found two ugly toothless rednecks fucking in the woods in my backyard. The man shouted at me close the door your letting the stank out which made no sense to me cuz we where outside. Whatever. just another Monday in the Northwoods.
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