I can't get out of the parking garage so now I'm staying downtown....Typical
It's happening again. I feel like I'm under water and my heart beat matches "Teenage Wasteland"
yeah people on the adjacent balcony, Im naked drinking outside in 0 degree weather at 1pm. got a problem?
You kept challenging people to a cartwheel contest...when someone finally agreed, you cartwheeled into some chicks face, then tried to propose to her as an apology. Fyi, she said no
drinking from the bathtub cause I'm too lazy to walk downstairs and too thirsty to care
Walking in on a gay threesome, with a girl in the corner watching and taking vid is a reason to not only knock, but to never go to Savannah.
I need to be drunk within 15 minutes of getting home tonight.
I really shouldn't have to tell you to stop banging your lightsaber on everything while we are in college.
I had sex in an engineering office last night. So that could be your life. I was mounted on top of a sketch of a future parking lot for a maintenance building. If that's not romantic, idk what is
I just shaved my pubes into a heart shape. if that doesn't scream romantic idk what does
THIS IS EXACTLY WHY YOU SHOULDA FUCKED BEFORE YOU MADE HIM YOUR BOYFRIEND, CURVED DICKS ARE NOT OK
Nothing like waking up and having two guys who aren't your boyfriend talk to you about their hard dicks before 9 am.
Update: I spent 10 minutes trying to fish out a rogue vagina weight.
How is it that 364 days a year I'm the adult, but on Halloween you completely forget how to have fun and become my grandma?
See that doesn't work because we've had sex so its awkward for you to call me mom
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