Just mADE A PArabola og urine
the guy i hooked up with is asleep on our couch. please dont fuck him.
Oh. Thats cool. Im not dating anyone right now. Sean gave me chlamydia from some GUY he fooled around with. Im being abstinent.
I am drunk as shit eating pancakes. I am not the person to call.
she uses eco-friendly sex toys. she is the literal definition of a hippie.
Do you remember using the vicegrip to demonstrate how wide your penis is?
We got buck wild in our animal onesies last night. You kept ripping off your tail in angry rages.
So is there a reason your dad is passed out naked in my shower? P.S. Congrats on the family dong.
I didn't get it..
I'm sorry. But to the original question please.
Yes she was blowing me but I couldnt see her face. The only light was from the sparklers she asked me to hold. I love 4th of July.
We helped him hit the bowl to the point that he didn't even have to move
Because you put the dick in ridiculously amazing boyfriend. And you deserve to have nice things happen to your penis. That's why.
He shit in the fireplace
I was sitting down, taking a piss with a boner, her cat walked into the bathroom and walked up to my legs, I sneezed and pissed all over her cat through between the toilet seat and bowl, it ran off screeching. She thought I peed on her cat on purpose. Kicked me out
when ur drunk laser tag is all fun n games. try it high and all of the aliens in the galaxy want you dead.
And it only took a fake engagement ring, a condom and a bowl of weed
Randomize
