You're only the seventh guy she's ever kissed. Somesones gunna get EPICALLY stalked
No vaginas are yucky and I don't think you're old enough to handle one yet
Jake just asked if thanksgiving was an american thing...I left the table
He promised he'd be the first bidder on my ebay item if i went home with him. Worth it.
and all i could think about was how mcdonalds would not be open anymore after we were done having sex
Sometimes I think I have so much sex with you to be sure you're actually straight.
I told him I'd go cook him breakfast, but ended up passing out on the kitchen floor in the fetal position spooning the dog
Either I just got hit on by a 10 year old.girl dressed like a boy or I just got hit on by a midget lesbian. Either way I feel uncomfortable
My dick was almost in plain McDonald's sight
I thought my dog was a polar bear. I kept asking how the north pole was this time of year.
But I REALLY want to hide my crazy for as long as possible with him so he'll date me.
Is 28 too old to get fingered in Centennial Park? Asking for a friend.
It was like 10 tiny penises being shoved in my vagina.
Sext me about skeletons
...and if you can get the necessary ingredients to make the Buffalo Chicken Melt, I will latch forever at your Teat of Justice.
Randomize
