butt plug
anus plug
rubbish cock?
yes
you suck at this game today
dude do u know what u did last night?
do i wanna know???
you totally walked in on some couple fuckin in their unlocked dorm room asking for directions to ur room...
I am no longer a man. I just realized I prefer Spongebob to college football.
Guess who is high enough to buy Jingle All The Way?
apparently he couldn't remember my name so he refereed to me as whats-her-boobs and everyone knew that it was me he was talking about
I am as serious as getting herpes in Mexico...
What do herpes have to do with anything?
But apparently I got kicked in the head by a stripper at some point
Shaving my legs with an ankle monitor on is surprisingly more difficult than the drunk driving that got me here
I told her I wanted to use him as a chew toy while simultaneously licking his face.
Did she tell him? And if so, was he cool with it? If yes, date him, date the fuck outta him.
Me and my bruised tit have to wake up at 4 AM.
I might run out into oncoming traffic. Id rather break my legs and/or die then continue with today.
Your poor dick will look at you and scowl for all the abuse he's going to take this week.
It's a shame, really, because he's got the cock of a horse... And the personality of dry toast.
He's petting your head, we need to leave now.
Have you had an orgasm with an n95 mask on yet? It was better than being choked.
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