school has made you so classy.
that's mcgill. producing sluts since 1884.
We just all danced like dinosaurs in the center of the dance floor.
its like the voldemort of pregnancies, we don't talk about it
My mom is purposely blasting Shania Twain downstairs so I can't jack off.
Are we responsible for the snowmen doing it doggy-style in my front yard?
Need toilet paper. Napkins suck. Slowly running out of those two and the bleeding hasn't stopped. Your cat is next
Im tired as fuck but i cant leave him here like this i gave him the acid and i feel the responsibillity to put his mind back together its fun im an architect about to about to construct a whole new belief and moral system inside this soul. Talk about the best psychothearpy
He knew exactly who I'd slept with after just one look at my crotch. He's like the Sherlock Holmes of cocks.
trying to figure out what happened last night by looking around the apartment.
naked man under the piano. THE PLOT THICKENS.
He hasn't texted me back since last week when we sexted. I think telling him I wanted to choke him with chains was a bit much for our first time.
I think there's an ice cream truck out back, but there's no way I can get pants on in time to catch it
mike is out of commission and cannot make breakfast. he's sitting with two frozen waffles on his face & smiling like an idiot.
I DID MY EXPERIMENTING. FOUR YEARS OF IT. IN HIGH SCHOOL.
I just really wish I could go back and unsex him. Waste of my vagina.
Adulthood is punching a guy in the face when you find out he's trying to fuck you and he's married instead of fucking him regardless and believing anything he says
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