You cheat on me once, shame on me. You cheat on me with a white girl, it's fucking over
I'm not trying to go crazy tonight either. I just want to go out, have a few drinks, meet up with my ex-boyfriend and get fingered or something.
We fucked on top of all of our English papers in celebration of the semester ending.
I have a challenge for you: find out where you are. you will receive Taco Bell if you succeed
well, the two that sent pics I've already been with, so at least its not just BAM HERE'S MY PENIS IN YOUR INBOX ENJOY THOSE MEGAPIXELS
That man deserves a slow clap... He defied the power of the vagina
The bar tenders gave me the number for a "taxi"... It's just a dude with a van. In retrospect, pretty sketchy. Robert was cool though.
No I did not just post a Craigslist ad for a used stripper pole because I can't afford my own. But now that you put the idea in my head I might have to.
so I was eating out this girl who was wearing my pirate hat In an alley behind the bar last night and some girl walks up and takes a picture. apparently we had a crowd of about 10 and it turned her on so she just didn't tell me
I learned a very valuable lesson tonight...don't touch a cops tazer
Sometimes I think he has a hidden camera in my vagina so he knows what I'm doing and saying at all times...
I think he's like Cher he's going to live forever but not as scary looking
That was the night I realized I need to grow up and stop eating mushrooms with strange 40 year old men in convertibles.
I learned so much in Pittsburgh
I'm going to get drunk, come back, call my grandma, and eat all those scrambled eggs.
He’s tiny, hairless and humps my leg when he wants sex. He’s basically a chihuahua
Randomize
