Random question, how's your gag reflex these days
i just rolled a joint on the giving tree. that book has given me so much.
i got so high last night i cried hysterically for like 5 minutes because i dont have any superpowers
My Adderall prescription says to take my recommended dose and throw away any leftover pills. Why don't more prescriptions come with jokes like this?
all of your clothes are in the front law. btw..sprinklers go on in 20 minutes
he described going down on me as being like 'entering a jungle of deliciousness and fur
I HAVE stop dating guys for their prescriptions, you have no idea how awkward family dinner was. Thank god for his xanax.
My phone saved "first signs of pregnancy" as a most visited search.
Your friends turned off our power in the basement and when we went to turn it back on I got sprayed in the face with a fire extinguisher. FYI.
She got the hiccups while deep throating me. It was epic. Once in a lifetime experience.
There's cereal in my underwear. Was I in your apartment at any time last night? That's the only logical explanation for this.
you texted him "it's time for the no pants dance", please get your tubes tied.
This is the drunkest I've ever been at a chili's
If there was a gecko involved in your BDSM I'm gonna have to request that not happen when we live together ;)
But once you are just right and I work my tongue in the right spots and hot wax your balls and inner thighs. I will have you right where I want you.
Who is this?
Oops wrong number
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