As a pleasant surprise..I woke to find a Burrito and Bottle of Gatorade .....Merry XMAS to ME
WHATEVER CLASS IS PLAYING "TOOT IT AND BOOT IT" AT 8:30 IN THE MORNING, I WANT IN.
We don't have a lot of plans besides weed and cake
its so hard to text. the buttons are tickling my fingers
as much as i want to say no i cant cause i need the trophy wife training
We drove around last night shotting fireworks out the window while they had sex in the back of his car
Please never let me the drunk fat dancer in the bus girl
Well my dad thinks I wake up at 3 or 4 am every day. Really it is just all the booty calls, but I'm glad he thinks I am so motivated
It's a "party harder or raise your standards" kind if night.
"Do You Wanna Build a Snowman" came on while I was riding his dick. I had to take a moment.
I may have unintentionally punched your cat twice but he's an asshole anyway.
The bar tender had his entire hand down your asscrack.
I forgot about that. I was in MULTIPLE dimensions.
After round two, I told him he deserves an award. He bowed and did a princess wave WHILE his dick was still inside me.
i can't believe i helped you shave your back last night, and she still didn't sleep with you.
I've decided I will have no shame for the things I don't remember doing.
Randomize
