Don't be scared. It'll feel very good. And you'll be clean afterwards. I'm growling right now.
Nothing commands respect in a meeting like Jack Daniels on the breath. You're fine.
I just know... :) goodntight
Whoops, meant "goodnight", but the other is true too.
I tried to tell him it was only 2:00, but he said since it was 5:00 in New York, it was perfectly acceptable. He then put on a Blues Brothers hat and a pair of wayfarers and left. I expect him home in a few hours with a police escort.
i cant even explain all the reasons why i dont want to fuck you right now.
I don't remember coming home but there is cereal EVERYWHERE
My mom just used the words "ice cunt". It may be an interesting day afterall.
I just took my friends on a tour of all the places I've had sex in my house. I dont know if that's more slutty, or the fact that it took 2 hours to complete..
Found out why they call her Halfpipe Jenny-NOT the cool reason we thought
listening to the two girls in the next stall finish a 40 and laugh at this guy they both fucked. they're calling him 'tulip dick'.
I made out with him with my retainers in. My drunken hook-ups get lazier and lazier.
I think I've just evolved into some kind of vodka fueled monster
If she "comes out" to me I guess I'll high five her. That's pretty much my response to everything these days.
AND I NEED A VIKING FUNERAL OR MY GHOST ASS WILL SAUNTER ON OVER AND CASTRATE HIM FOR TECHNICALLY MURDERING ME
i found you laying on the floor staring at the ceiling and you kept muttering "why" in various inflections.
Randomize
