Omg I just drooled on the screen of my phone from smiling with my mouth open while textin bahahahaahah
I thought he was joking about bailing you out until I saw the picture of you and the sheep in the morning paper. Were those my boots you had on it
my summer class's final was canceled bc it interfered with the world cup. he is giving us all A's on it. I love europe
I dont know how to say this. But the hottest girl where im at has one arm.
It took me 6months to figure out that he only had one testicle.
I think he's in need of mouth to penis resuscitation. Which I happen to be certified
Damn, it's been so long since I had sex I could use the cobwebs from my vagina to decorate for Halloween.
pretty sure 5 days for a bachelor party in Vegas is too long when even the stripper giving me a lapdance says "wow that's a long time!"
k. The important thing is we are going out. You are stones. I am mildly hallucenating.
He said I gave him the best head he's ever had and I bowed. I BOWED.
I hope so much that you got average or above average dick tonight because I wish you the best
Thanks for coming out I think haley is drunk enough for breast milk White Russians
How does one acquire holy water?
I'm just so full of love and alcohol
My boobs are hoarders, they steal food and hide it. Greedy bitches.
Randomize
