I thought she would fill the void you created. Turns out she thought I just wanted to fill hers.
i find it depressing how it takes me longer to find a good video compared to the actual jacking off process.
She gave him HEAD floating down the river in a tube as big a a tire. I just don't know how to compete with that sort of level of slut.
It smells like ranch
Must be all the white people
I mean, I know going to rehab probably didn't make her a lesbian, but I can always hope
Those mornings you wake up with a Barbie tramp stamp are the mornings that are the that are going to make me miss this place
I have random bruises including my spine and visible bite marks on my neck. Thanksgiving car sex accomplished.
there's a girl on facebook trying to buy me a pizza. I can't say no... right?
I mean I love some drunk compliments, but he just wasn't up to my low standards.
Come share oat with me in your robe
YOU TOOK A FUCKING SNAP OF ME TRYING TO PEE! I'M GOING TO FUCK YOU WITH THE BUSINESS END OF A RUTED RAKE!
I feel like I could have been bitchier and missed an opportunity.
I'm not well. Although it could be worse.
My cousin is so hungover she quit her job.
Omg. I meet up with you guys with bodily fluids on my chin ONE time and suddenly I'm a whore.
I thought I was at a rave until the paramedics started chasing me. You win again tequila.
Randomize