no, there's no challenge. I live a humble lifestyle out of virtue.
You wear Armani Exchange.
just joined the mile high club. if this plane crashes because of this text, it was worth.
we're almost there. Shes pounding on the car window telling the nurse whos on a smoke break to fuck off.
we started the countdown to drunken sledding this weekend.
I wonder if her husband knows I have my own drawer at the apartment
My hair is short now so it will be easier to give you alot more blow jobs
I'm going to take this text and frame it on my mantle
I didn't even have pants on and you think I had an agenda
I mentioned the porn thing he mentioned a brother it all kinda just came together
I have bruises all over my legs. Did I hit a car with my bike last night?
Grandma and I are gonna see the new Tarzan movie, because we both appreciate shirtless Swedish men
Does anyone remember last night? Because I still don't know why I now own a goldfish and a ceiling fan made of pizza?
NOT PREGNANT HIGH FIVE!
Did you happen to find the other half of my bra last night?
One can only be this extremely wet once a year and I feel like I'm bitch slapping god by not using this gift he has bestowed on me.
Just because my bed is easier to get to doesn't mean it's okay to fuck in.
Randomize
