OH MY GOD! I just remembered how we ended our bar time last night: picking up and drinking random drinks that ppl had left. wtf is wrong with us?! that's so ghetto!
No. You're kidding.
I am not. I wish I were. I speak the truth.
I'm at a bar that has girls so awful looking even you would not have sex with them.
Well... I doubt that.
I couldn't deal, she's a vegetarian. Every woman should like a little meat in their mouths.
I've heard so many rumors about me being taken home in an ambulance I'm starting to believe them.
Apparently someone switched my cash for monopoly money after midnight so I couldn't get any more drinks at the bar
Oh my god. I'm sorry if i peed on you last nite. I am truly disgusting
got into a fight with a bouncer over who's moustache is better again last night...
It wasn't like a party or anything. They played PlayStation and talked about sports. Then I threw up on his porch.
Tried to drunkenly hop a fence with my cast on to get away from the cops but ended up falling over a bench.. how do I explain those bruises to my parents?
fuck it. im taking monday off to do some Jagering.
I was so drugged up it was amazing, I felt like a dinosaur "because I enjoyed spinach, and I got apple juice and only dinosaurs get apple juice" according to me the day of, and last night I felt like a rocket ship
Who knew that showing someone your boobs would make them stop crying.
where did we go last night? there's dollar bills all over my room & they're all wet.
Dude. $3 Jack n Cokes AND Cheesesticks... Find me tomorrow plz
Well, not only did I find out the Top Knight has roof access, I also let a guy I just met eat me out on the roof. Seems like a lot of wins if you ask me.
Randomize