i am only reminding you that showing off your fellatio skills on vegetables is probably not an appropriate party trick
we played lady & the tramp with a hash brown from McDonald's....im in love.
He had to pee in the sink beside my head because the girl that I was taking care of was passed out on the toilet. To answer your question: yes i took a peek. Thats why we hooked up later.
remember the used condom we threw behind my bed? my mom found it and is accusing me and making a big deal out of it,
Haha! You pissed me off, so I actually told her to go look behind your bed. Good thing I moved to Nevada, so your dad can't kick my ass. Good luck bitch.
I sent her 8 pictures of my dick in a baked potato. Not sure how I thought that would get me laid later.
I think the main reason you were throwing up so much was the quart of soap you chugged trying to burp bubbles. you came close
Mom just posted ur drunk pix from Cancun in the newly made "My not-so-fantastic son" album. Thought you should know.
Dude Eric's high and buying everyone taquitos. How much room do we have in the freezer?
I was passed out in a dog food bowl tor two hours. Just tapped my dinner beer. I love homecoming.
I can feel your movements against the shared wall we are leaning up against. It makes me feel as though we are one. Queue Pocahontas song...
He asked if I was going to squirt out my bday candles. I'm glad the perversion doesn't stop for special occasions.
Asking me to suck on my nipples isn't going to make me less mad at you.
Better not shit yourself at the gym.
I was at a hookups house and peed in his sink so I wouldn't wake up his mom... drunk me is on a different level
He's eating me out right now. That's how bad he is.
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