...there is blood under my fingernails.
...I hope my roomates are okay.
small problem..I have a major exam in the morning so I might have to go to the library after the party
so no drinking for you?
don't be silly
Correct me if I'm wrong, but I did not stop moving last night. If tequila gives me that extra push to have an active lifestyle, so be it.
I feel like a fucking princess. Like an heiress of a kingdom of drugs.
He puked in the funnel and continued to chug it. Who is this dude?
I basically have a picture with a half naked foreign exchange student. He kept screaming rolltide and i felt like a traitor
AND FUCKING MGMT JUST CAME ON. CAN I GO DROWN MYSELF IN LESBIANS OR SOMETHING? IS IT TIME TO LESBIAN
we're fated to lesbian
The cougar has a calendar on her wall of when she can give topless handjobs again. I pity her husband.
He'd pee in it. And since it's PBR I'd have no idea
Ok I've processed it. Who the fuck makes out drunk in a parking lot in a backseat with the windows down in the middle of the day?!?!
One day i'll wow you with artfully trimmed pubes.
He will forever be known as the toe sucker who may or may not have been a father
I HAVE A FLAME THROWER. COME SEE IT. IT’S SAFE AND WORKS.
he was wearing a pyjama shirt under a dress shirt under a hoodie under a robe under a rain poncho the man was prepared for anything
if by making eggnog you mean drinking all the spiced rum, then yes, she's making eggnog
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