in pain and im wearing pink underwear
so?
i dont own pink underwear
I just saw a hobo ride by on a unicycle. Good day.
it was like my fingers were behind enemy lines
they said he just opened the front of his shirt and threw up alll over himself
if that blanket by the dog bowl was your dog's "bed" then i apologize to bailey for having sex on it
at one point he couldn't find his underwear so he put on my catsuit to go to the bathroom
I was informed that last night we held hands while puking on the curb outside the bar.
We just have a real special relationship.
No you usually just ranted about the voicemail bitch until she cut you off again
So he says "my girlfriends coming over so you have to leave but I love you"
Gold rum. Strong marijuana. Jabba the Hut in stilettos. Deep thigh bruise. Yes, thal all happened. Sorry dude.
She crossed her eyes and threw up into a glass while sitting at the bar. It was fifty shades of sketchy dude.
Almost ran over girl selling candy bars for charity. Pretty much obligated to buy at that point.
Oh were you the stripper at that club last Sunday when i was trippin on acid wearing a giraffe outfit?
he just ran into my room in his giant penis costume yelling "supercock to the rescue"... I am still in total shock
True strength comes from lack of pants
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