i am fully taking advantage of taking advantage of him
i woke up to see him pissing on your n64. thats like killing a unicorn. punishable by death for sure.
You're the host. Of course you wear the diaper. It's like wearing the pants.
I may also break bread with strippers. Because it is passover.
Turns out vomit takes off spray tan.
yeah...i noticed he pets people when he's drunk. It's odd.
I hid drinks in her bathroom closet.... like a squirrel... a squirrel who knew she was going to get cut off soon
I honestly think the worst part about the night is they just kicked us out of the park and we didn't even get to go into Disneyland Jail
there is a video of me on Facebook getting mad at a trash bin what the fuck was in your Pepsi
Is it too early in the day to ask a nipple-related question?
I've literally exhausted all the videos on pornhub. It took like 4 years, but I've done it. I did that quicker than I finished college
She came into the salon and said, "Don't judge me. Yes that's cum in my hair and I want a shampoo, cut and style."
Just found a rebirth in peppermint schnapps. May be able to stay up all night and finish this paper after all. MERRY CHRISTMAS
Sexual side note: sushi and cum do not mix well. That is all.
I got drunk. Then I took a shit.
It was a good shit
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