no really all good couples have similar hair colors!
My nipple rings set off the metal detector at the courthouse this morning.
Not enough. Tell the person next to you to give you their drink. I give you permission. And then chug it. Be a hero tonight.
He had seven beers and tap-danced on the table like a pro. HOW DOES HE DO IT
I don't think boys are aware how difficult it is to take a picture of your own ass.
We were Chugging coronas for the soul purpose of launching limes out of the 3rd story window, I'd say it was a good weekend
I might have been the first person to be rolling balls at a referee seminar
I just pictured ballsacks being shoveled into the furnace of the Titanic.
Yeah. Moral of the story: Don't mace yourself. It sucks dick.
He just yells "mush!" as they're having sex.
Your the only person I know that needed stiches after a Monday morning conference call. How are you in your 20s? How
I've never SEEN someone give negative fucks before. It's actually rather impressive. I want to study under them.
A German guy asked me to take a bath with him. I can't tell if he's just an eccentric European or a run of the mill creep.
just found a joint on the street in downtown. smoked it with the hot guy from my chem class
WHAT IS UP WITH YOU SMOKING/ DRINKING THINGS OFF THE GROUND?
Is there a way to use porn to inspire him to have dirty thoughts? Like the movie Inception except with more lube and orgams?
Randomize
