sooooo how many boyfriends is too many?
Dude if you're in another zip code it doesn't count
You don't understand. I'm not like you.
We just took shots out of seashells. Welcome spring break 10.
Are they hot? And are the slutty? These are my concerns for any wedding. You say yes, and yes, I will be your best man
at which point I apparently ran in and shouted "I made the sex with that one!"
yeah I'm sure your grandparents are the best but it's halloween. get a slutty costume and let's go ham.
I'm glad we are bonding over both contracting clamidya. Winners.
100%
Guess who just screamed "Everything happens for a reason!!" in the abortion clinic. This girl.
Please tell me I didn't try to make out with a 70 year old Romanian man last night ...
wait did i hook up with someone in mcdonalds last night?
She still didn't believe that he would cheat on her so I finally said "how else would I know that his batman mask is still in the back of his car from halloween?" I think she accepted it
Dude, i just watched a drag queen dropkick a motherfucker. this is a good night.
I have jizz, in my hair. I'm sitting in class with jizz. In. My. Hair. I need to make better life choices.
If Dr Phil has taught me anything about myself, it’s that I can seriously relate to those women who fake their pregnancies.
I'll be naked. By 11. Then arrested. Drunk tank adventures
Randomize
