We walked 2 miles, legit 2 miles, and purchased 7 half gallons. One for each of us. Intense
I like how the only thing you spelled correctly is "i'm tequila"
her night didn't end so well, both of her boyfriends got arrested... together.
he just asked if we wanted to go to an arts and crats club with him tomorrow. every day it becomes harder for me to defend his sexuality
Take off that red sweater and wear my vagina as a facemask.
Things are burning & the world smells of peanut butter. It's beautiful.
We can't be fuck buddies. You stare into my eyes while we fuck.
When exactly does a bender just become a lifestyle?
definitely just forgot to put car in park in front of a police officer and ran into a bush.
Oh no. Not her. Her personality clashes with mine in ways that would make me wanna beat myself with a stick.
I'm just now starting to feel better... I remembered sleeping on the floor. I was peeing and saw his rug and it looked so comfy
I just saw a girl drinking wine and walking her dog in footie pajamas and a mad hatter hat. First day of the new year and I think I'm in love.
I feel like you should put up a missed connections ad for this..
What'd I miss?
Erotic hypnosis and studded dog collars.
THERE IS A MAN IN THE BATHROOM IN COLONIAL GARB GET HERE
Today I made my parents proud-spent the afternoon floating around in their pool drinking beer-which I would ask my nephews to get for me out of the fridge
Randomize
