i've come to the conclusion that there is no classy way to apply chloroseptic spray to your butthole.
Ridin mah bike see you on the moon
you were holding her hair as she threw up saying "I'm going to be a great doctor" repeatedly.
That's what you get for fucking someone nicknamed "wiggle worm"
That's why you NEVER put anything a stripper gave you in your mouth
I JUST SAW A SIGN LANGUAGE CATFIGHT
I am drunk. Riding an elevator. You can smell the beer. Doctor on with me just smiling at me... He agrees, fuck cancer.
He started using my brother's rc helicopter as a beer delivery device. He's a drunk McGyver.
Ughhhh. Finnnneeeeee. I'll have sex with your brother. Sheesh. The things I do for you woman.
I said that I'm avoiding parties and guys, and the freshman girl just laughed
I LIKE NICE BOXERS OKAY!? COMBINED WITH A GLORIOUS DICK JUST MAKES THIS EVEN BETTER. WE MOVE IN TOGETHER AND THAT PIC'S GETTIN FUCKING FRAMED.
How does one un superglue their foot to the floor
So don't be alarmed when you go into your bathroom, he's sleeping in the tub with your brothers dinosaurs. also I'll clean up the sticky floor later. (you don't wanna know)
You need to stop vomiting in the washing machine, bro. For real this time.
So I considered mediating this morning and instead I master-bated...same thing right?
Randomize
