This boy just came into class wearing sperrys and a polo but also carrying a longboard. I'm unequivocably attracted to his level of doucheyness.
I hope my theory books are in my locker, but if not, I guess I can always share with you.
Who said I want to share with you?
You've sucked my dick, I'm pretty sure you don't care if I look at your theory book.
Just so you know, I'm standing in my bra eating cereal. My keys were in the cereal box.
Just threw up in nordstroms while shopping for moms bday with dad. He distracted workers for me. No more tequila
Got home. Hugged Mom. The look on her face indicated she noticed nipple rings.
She got a text from her mom saying "you better not sleep with him, we all know how he is". IV ONLY BEEN HERE A WEEK
It's taking 3 penises to fill the hole he left in my heart.
nothing worse than walking out of class after 3 hours and having covered exactly zero information
walking out with herpes. that would be worse
I'm doing somethin that's never been done before...the 10 am booty call come over
Well. Turns up no one actually knows who that kid was. Came in, said happy fathers day, chilled for a while, then left.
Just turned your apartment into a democracy and were voting on who takes shots next
Can I come over? I respect you, but I want disrespectful things to happen
whats our policy on dating high schoolers?
we dont have a policy but im pretty sure the state of michigan does
Just kidding. Don't worry, you're getting sugar and orgasms for Valentine's day.
I'm just going to assume my unresponsive booty calls are just preparing for the women's march tomorrow
Randomize
