Hahahhahaha! Oooh get it! Ugh I am so dead but if I go to the lib whuich I will hopefully b havung sex instead, ill hit u up
i went to disney world today with my friends, met snow white, then saw her later at a bar. she is naked next to me in her bed, passwed out. when you wish upon a star...
Hotel room at 3 am. She's 42. Stockings and heels. All because I opened with a joke about cougar hunting. We'll high-five later.
I just did something awful... i just had to tell someone... i just used my brothers electric face cleaner as a vibrator
i'm at the gym and so are four guys who have seen my tits. i need winter break.
Idk what else to talk about besides you paying for half of my vaginaplasty.
I sat down next to him and my bra just unhooked itself
I heard moaning and ass slapping and sponge bob.
I'm sitting in the breakroom facing a very large sign that says "inappropriate workplace behaviors", and i can't help but feel like it is directed at me
She swallowed the key to the cuffs, I've been having to explain the pink fuzz all morning.
His dad and I had a drunk conversation about life. At 4 am he told me that I was 21 and cute and should fuck whoever I want.
"I licked someones beard, because I can."
Can you explain the Transformers set up for battle in my living room?
Before making travel and hotel reservations to meet your "affair" for the first time, consult your menstrual calendar! $633 wasted!
That chick keeps sending eggplant emojis
Welcome to dating in the digital age. Better catch up now that you’re divorced
and eggplant is code for penis. It means she’s DTF. Go get her tiger!!!
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