his logic is that since hes already cheated on her w me its doesnt count
i saw like six of her guido cousins in the jersey shore trailer alone. her family is having a dinner party for the premiere tonight.
I decided that just having that story under my belt and being able to tell it to my grandchildren is worth the regrets of the evening.
never thought i'd see a ''climb of shame'' until she came down from the attic in front of the whole party..
He asked what my name was on facebook chat. IT SAYS RIGHT THERE. i will never be drunk enough for this guy.
You spent about half an hour trying to convince me that mesh condoms were a good idea.
Im going to buy a thermometer. If its above 104 im going to the hospital if its under 104 im going to the bar
the bouncer watched the girl drop her ID, saw me pick it up and say OMG SHE LOOKS LIKE ME, and then let me use it to get into the bar
She's cheated on every boyfriend she's ever had with the same guy. She's like a slutty yo-yo.
I don't even want to go. i just want to be a hermit and live in a cave with an elephant that pisses vodka
The party got busted because you two got caught having sex on the neighbors trampoline, come on man.
We found you facedown on his couch in a pile of cheerios, with only one shoe on. Dude you said you were staying in last night.
Some people dream of being astronauts others dream of having genitalia that shines like Edward Cullen in the sun
Why can't he just dump me? This is like a baby seal clubbing the hunter
just played fuck the dealer and thunderstruck with my physics ta. he is the third ta that i have drank with this semester, i think i'm getting good at college
Randomize
