i have absolutely no control over my now miserable and whore-ish lifestyle.
her teeth should be alot whiter from all of those blowjobs she gives
you started puking right when a nickelback song came on..it was epic
sitting in class between the roommates of the two girls i fucked over break. this feels like a bad version of wife swap
I'm going to leave the fate of whether I go to my midterms up to my dealer hitting me up or not
Oh man, buzzed lunch fridays almost got out of hand.
I'm ordering a French maid costume for my dog too. It's like a couples costume, except for losers with dogs.
So it turns out that my mom and her dad used to hook up when they were our age
Never been so glad that I look so much like my dad that there's no question as to my paternity
I made a wizard staff out of Keystone light... I am therefore the smoothest wizard in all of our university's history.
I heard you shushing me, but my screaming orgasm drowned it out.
Apparently, the Mormons have taken over airports. I was told by a befuddled looking clerk I couldn't buy a beer with breakfast before 6am.
You know, I think when I have a lot of free time, thats when I pick up odd lovers. Maybe keeping busy is key to not using my vagina
who has a one night stand on Christmas ? But he's pretty attractive so thumbs up
now acid just makes me think of crab ragoon
she threw up on her exam, awkwardly wiped it off with her sleeve and continued writing.
Randomize
