There was a point where some of my friends attempted 'moi's', which stands for makeout on introduction.
It involved going up to women and very aggressively trying to make out with them upon meeting them
Surprisingly the success rate was exceedingly high
Who has a tranny cab driver? I have a tranny cab driver.
i just saw someone crawling up the stairs to the dorm while screaming "i have the best vagina!"
We were hooking up and you crawled into bed with us, because you had lost your phone and didn't "want to be alone at a time like this."
I'm at Home Depot to get supplies to fix the wall we cracked by fucking too hard against the bookshelf.
It's 4th of July all over again, we were chasing with the pool water.
screw jello shots the kids from the culinary school made pudding shots with 4 loko.
I've drank literally 19 beers and am still good. Utah is worthless
What's protocol when the 18 year old son of an anti-gay preacher sends you a message on Grindr during church?
I HAVENT SEEN A PENIS IN 5 WEEKS I REFUSE TO REMAIN CALM
Im part way to drunk.
do you think there's enough of the fabric you gave me to make a crop top for a cat?
Im at a south american orphan benefit auction drinking stoli in a coffee mug, this is what my life has become, thanks a lot community college
everytime he speaks i want to fuck him less. i just wanna tell him to shut up and take his pants off and we could both be happy.
When the nurses wouldn't let him smoke in the hospital he decided to just roll around on the floor.
Randomize
