how's this sound. You, me a box of pink franzia and a night full of possibilities in your basemen. I'll be me. You be you. And we'll see where it goes
eating raw peppers to burn the taste of semen out of my mouth
All you have to drink is moonshine and ranch. This is bullshit.
She tried to sit inside the drawer to my dresser and when it broke, she burst into tears calling herself fat. Too high to deal with this
as he was fingering me, all I was thinking about was how lucky his girlfriend is...
Going to be a long day. text me later. Sorry I puked in your sink.
Don't be surprised if I hand out mini dildos on Halloween
Ran out of deodorant. Febreze on a paper towel? Kicking college's ass.
NOTHING IN THE WORLD IS GOOD SOFT
NOT ICECREAM NOT DICKS
NOTHING
I just found a grey hair. On my nipple. Fuck you too, Mother Nature.
If you're signed up as "sober sister" can you do cocaine or nah
fuck sobriety. I want to wake up tomorrow in a park or some shit.
he said he couldn't believe he just lost his virginity and passed out. what have i done
Learned two new lessons today: 1) Do not identify pills found in one's car by taking them to see what happens, especially while at work, and 2) There is no logical reason to keep ambien in one's vehicle...
He bought me a bottle of Malibu. I think I could love this guy.
I've loved people for a lot less.
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