...., I just tried brushing my hair wothh a toothbrushg. fail
ps not my toothbrush awkward.
This fat girl in front of me just got on the bus to go 2 blocks. Do you think she ever wonders why shes fat?
Thank you for leaving pool of vagina on my girlfriends carpet.
i can't believe he got me to come over to him by waving a natty light at me.
he pretended not to hear me say our safety word. how do you think I feel?
You picked a jagger girl up claimed her then walked out the door with her that was the last we saw of you
I'm covered in mustard and it looks like I nose dived in to barbed wire ??? Was last night that good?
Our group of friends now have more broken bones than reasonable excuses for why they're broken.
Let's play the game let's see how long Kayla can be sober
There they were doing the deed on the beach, looked like two seagulls fighting over a chicken bone.
I woke up and sent him a text that said 'I'm sorry forever'
Just when I thought I was growing up, I go out and TOTALLY REDEEM MYSELF
His front door was open but I INSISTED on army crawling FOOT FIRST under the garage door. Then I peed the bed.
its a recording of you guys having sex?!
its actually 30 minutes of him begging and then 2 minutes of sex.
You know something is wrong with your lifestyle when you have to clean easy Mac cheese powder off of your scale
at least it's not cocaine like last time
Randomize
