Just passed a sign for an "adult food and fuel superstore". Wtf does that even mean?
im not sure but a few things come to mind which just makes me giggle
Guys should not giggle. Ever.
I just ran from Santa Claus in Kroger
we usually just have an Easter beer hunt and never end up at church anyways
He is going overseas for 8 months, not only was that blowjob a going away present, but i was supporting the troops
My dad walked in on me masturbating in my own apartment.....my own apartment!!
If you don't remember anything tomorrow, this is to remind you that you asked me in secret to build a bobsled with you and re-enact Cool Runnings.
Voted patient of the month again at the urgent care. I need to rethink my life choices.
Ive seen teh same guy pissing in the corner. Twice. Its eally weird. My frieds gonna do th funnel. Im so excited for her! Love, cori. Cuz its lik a diary.
I showed up to a booty-call in my onesie pajamas and rubber boots
Goldenshlager is a hell of a drink. And these are the adventures ur missing out on w me. I gave someone a bath Emily. A BATH.
Awkward
Can't say I wouldn't let it happen again.
High me just had to pick the lock on my sisters room because I locked my vodka in there. I love vacation.
I asked him if he wanted a pillow, and he replied "No. Batman never had pillows."
Does he know you were at a strip club taking shots of tequila right before you babysat his son?
On a side note, my ex husband offered to buy me shrooms
I still judge her for aggressively trying to get coke from my date but pretty cool that she's a black belt
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