hot girl, 5 o clock
do you know how to read a clock?
Just used my last prints at the library for brackets instead of final reviews. Hello March.
It was ths the worst 15 minutes of my life. . . It was like fucking a warm stick of butter.
I just sit in the cubicle for 8 hours and do keagles.
I might have been fine if i had magic teleportation powers and could have skipped the car ride between bar and home
I love my life sometimes. I do miss being an adult, from time to time, but a little vodka always changes my mind.
I need to stop acting like a drunk bitch. People are going to get the right idea about me...
We had sex on roll out bean bag chair, and then proceeded to sleep with a blanket with dolphins on it. Happy birthday to me.
Just in case the world ends tomorrow, I have an emergency contact group of booty calls I can send a quick "let's fuck" to before I die.
My drug dealer bought me a book for Christmas. What a gentleman.
Yes, you can go into Petsmart drunk but the cats awaiting adoption don't appreciate the soft pretzels squeezed through their cages.
eh, I feel I'm heading for a breakdown and I need to get it out of the way before I start writing that lab report.
I wasn't going to drink tonight, but was reminded this is the anniversary of prohibition being repealed. If I don't, then I am against my profession of bartending and anti-American, right?
Tonight I learned to never try to impress your ex by dancing on the stripper pole while drunk. That’s how you end up in the ER
These business classes have improved my drug business ten fold
Randomize
