She thought I was gay, so I told her I'd be more comfortable with anal. She agreed.
btw he is cheating on one twin with the other. the main woman in his life has a mullet. I defiantly have either the coolest or weirdest uncle ever
The EMTs said they would give me as many blankets as I wanted if I didn't pee in the ambulance. They even turned on the sirens.
I'm trying to decide whether it's worth it to masturbate in this gas station bathroom
Remember the couple Steve and I heard and rated their sex based on the bed squeaks cuz we couldn't sleep through the noise? We got them back. They turned up the radio to drown us out.
I have random bruises including my spine and visible bite marks on my neck. Thanksgiving car sex accomplished.
It's like some sort of initiation to finger one of them... so I did it. And got high fived afterwards like a dozen times.
Those were right hand only?
So both cops helped talk her into coming back into the bar and doing a shot with me. The main argument being, "a bar is no place to be sober!"
When you put the phrases "just out of shower" and "did you get the picture" that close together, a picture of hamburger helper is not exactly what I expected to pop up.
You know you're doing college wrong when you have to bail your RA out of jail
I'm at a loss. By loss I mean singing songs from Wicked and pretending I'm at the Oscars
Also you can't just sext a Michelle quote from Full House.
I told him I had the birth control implant in my arm and he looked me in the eyes, said "Science!" and came in me
just call my name and ill be there, if we are puking, beating up bitches, or pickin up men, OR avoiding wierd men, so many situations require a wingman
Just called to hear your voice and talk about pizza.
Randomize
