; Think of how many worthless people would b non existant if there was no liquor so their parents never hooked up
about to try to wax my asshole... wish me luck
I smelled my fingers after she left and they smelt like sugar cookies. I want that one again.
he passed out at 11 at a party. he deserved to be stripped down an duct taped to the floor
I fell asleep with all the lights and heat on in the apartment with windows open, Earth Hour is lost on people like me.
They high fived mid Eiffel Tower, then we all proceeded to talk about how our friendship is much stronger now. I'd say a successful first threesome.
Besides asking our teacher if he enjoyed being fisted did I have any other tragic moments last night?
There is nothing more demoralizing than exchanging 150 dollar Christmas gifts with a girl your not sleeping with
While I was fucking him, he grabbed a taco off his shelf and started eating it. I had taco dripped on me. I have no idea where the taco came from.
he drank half a bottle of bushmills, stood up to pee over the side, pissed his pants, sat in the puddle on the deck, told me my life goals were stupid and impossible, and wouldn't leave until 5am. by the time I got up at 8 I had 4 texts and 2 fb messages from him. AND HE STILL THINKS IT WENT WELL
But like it was sooo bad! At one point he tried to flip me over and he fell off the bed
I’d feel the same about religion. We can talk about it, but I want you to go down on me first
How’s your Christmas Eve so far?
I just chased my melatonin with red wine. It’s 12:00pm.
Dog. I woke up between my ex boyfriend witch i'm currently fucking and his bestfriend spooning me in MY bestfriends empty powerless house still really fucked up. No one knows what happend.
To describe how high he was he said, " I'm cocked out of my ape sandwich" so yes...that was some pretty good weed.
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