she was a 2....and a legitimate 2. like, helen keller is a 1, this girl...2.
I sat a few seats down and one row behind a cute girl at the Cubs game today. Having watched her talk to the guy next to her, I found out only her name and age. I then used that information and pieced it together with over 500 girls on Facebook with the same name. I found the same girl, and we're now fbook friends.
if being a creepy fuck was an olympic sport, they'd think you were using performance enhancing drugs...
i'm drunk and confused. there might be a 4 year old here.
Well yes but because of that incident i now salute to truck drivers
Which is worse rug burn on your nipples or laying there after wondering how long you have to cuddle before you can sneak away?
Ok well I'll be up all night studying if you need a wake up call or a place to put your penis.
He gave me an orgasm before we even reached 2nd base, everything he did in high school is irrelevant.
I won the booty shaking contest by mooning the whole bar
"just because you look like a short version of scarlet johanson does not mean I would immediately fuck you" that was the single.most difficult thing to say. but seriously I don't want the roots of the whore tree anywhere near my junk.
And that's why we do second round interviews for possible roommates.
is it weird to think that girls born in '96 are now legal?
I fucking hate tequila. Tequila makes me hate pants.
You what they say. One dick in the hand is better than two in the bush
We are so drunk half our team had to bowl with a chaperone. We won every game. We drink
But forealz I'm gonna need a solid 52 orgasms so hydrate.
Randomize
