he rolled over and started playing skeeball on his iphone after we had the best sex yet considering he only lasted 10 seconds last time.. im getting standards.. tomorrow. for now im just going to enjoy the fact i counted over 20 this time.
What's wrong?
Long week. Sore muscles. Bad back. Hangover. Mini-keg. Crazy ex-wife. Unavailable love-interest. Dead celebrity families. Republicans.
Pussy.
For the whole 7 seconds I lasted, I was in heaven.
He just asked me if his big had a curved penis. Awkward? I think so.
TRUE LIFE: my roommate is growing a bush.
better yet, TRUE LIFE: my roommates boyfriend begged her to grow a bush.
So. Much. Sex. I feel like i ran a marathon then someone kicked me in the vagina. Soo worth it
Yes, I am about to pass out on my beanbag with a mason jar of wine. Welcome to the south freshmen.
Me and him getting it in is for special occasions only. Like Christmas and when they bring the McRib back.
I vote for a trading skills night. You teach me to juggle, I'll teach you knife fighting, and we'll both learn banjo
He whispered "Are you feeling it now Mr. Krabs?" when he was inside me. That is NOT my fetish.
He slapped my ass... He best ask me out. Or figure out how to unslap my ass.
I shit myself when I came, don't have flu sex
I don't know why I bit your face last night but I'm sorry .
I got my period today and I cried tears of joy. And then just cried because my cramps are actually killing me from the inside out.
One day no one will want to send me dick pics so by all means keep 'em coming
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