i was looking up hair salons in ithaca for the wedding and one is a hair salon/ sake bar! you can have sake or champagne while you get your hair done!
question, how would one sake-bomb while getting hair done without getting a horrible haircut?
Let's just say he looked at my vagina like it was a rubics cube.
Who has a video camera? i want to look back on this one day and say OH thats why i spent 2 years in jail
he came on my stomach, took his sock off, wiped it up, put his sock back on along with his shoes and left.
Her voice kills me. Its the perfect pitch to fuck with my hangover.
That hot guy i showed you guessed my exact bra size. I want to have his tan babies.
I felt guilty, it was so good!
Guilty? Oh great, I give the Jewish mother-in-law of blowjobs.
He asked me how france is treating me
Tell him you got so much dick you may never come back to the US. That ought to keep him away
So lets not base feelings on vagina tingles
I went over to help her build a porch, but we decided that was too much work, so we just got high and watched Scooby Doo
I'm resourceful. I forgot we don't have coca cola so now I'm drinking Jack & Dew or Mountain Daniels. Also, I haven't decided on an official name yet for this drink. I'm leaning toward Jack & Dew
you can only text me tonight if its in drake lyrics. thats the rule
I am laying in your bed and just found a bottle of wine under your pillow ...should have married you...
I think it might be the guy sitting next to me. I've concluded he HAS to be smuggling insane amounts of onions in his wardrobe to smell like that
You went outside, peed in the front yard, and asked me to bring you some toilet paper.
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