fun fact: cucumber in vinegar with pepper = best ever high snack
A freshman just woke up on our back pourch... He swears there was a party here last night but we didn't have one
oh there is nothing like the 1st beerbong of the school year
pretty sure that I broke my nose during sexting. Life is grand.
SLUTTIEST. 4TH. EVER.
Help. All alone. Room is. Changing colors. Dance party 2010, but without dancing.
Kill yourself wednesday started off with a bang, and im pretty sure im still drunk from tequila tuesday.
she brought my homemade cookies with condoms taped to the box... im in love
The cop asked you if you had been drinking and you said you drank milk out of a cow.
I rememeber. I showed him the picture on my phone of me drinking out of the utter, right?
I actually bought food at McDonald's as an apology for what I was about to do to their bathroom.
I puked up my nose. THAT kind of night
Yiu ever laugh so hard you stop breathing? Turns out weed -can- kill you.
I tried to get more sleep but the universe decided I needed a drunken freshman instead
I've broken 3 vibrators in the past month because I apparently am "too rough" with them. Is that even possible?!
HILY FUCK HES HERE I HAVE MONISTAT IN ME HE SUPRISED ME
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