we're blogging at a bar
Incredible sex, Maddow, more sex, spoon, sex again
my roommate just caught me washing a dildo in the sink.
my mom just asked me why she found a half-eaten burrito in the hamper
the can pyramid on my head actually reached a decent height before I moved.
I've decided, even as much fun as it sounds, I don't care for his sodomy box.
When I came in she was screaming "boundaries!" at the cat because it was trying to eat her pizza rolls.
the realtor just took us to a house I had a one night stand in. I feel like it's a sign.
Repeat the weekend mantra. "I like boys with teeth, I need boys with teeth, I deserve boys with teeth, I will have boys with teeth".
I dont have any paper so I'm writing class notes on my first response direction pregnancy paper. Judging eyes are all around.
I resisted the temptation to hold the cake in one hand to alternate bites with the ruffles I was eating. I decided that might make me look dysfunctional.
blew off easter dinner with the fam to go play shot roulette. woke up in nothing but my boxers in the back of a random pickup truck.
You know those twins i had a crush on in grade school? Just woke up between them. Best. Party. EVER.
Did you know they have a bouncer at Applebee's because I did not
I'm basically cruising around listening to 90's gangsta rap with my meatball sub telling people to go fuck themselves
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