Is it possible for Craig Seger to wear a normal suit and not look like an asshole on national tv?
Yeah, I was googling pictures of sharks, and I accidentally typed "shart." Huge mistake.
who the fuck is that kid sitting with you...
I don't have any fucking idea. I woke up and he was there. I'm kinda creeped out.
How am I suppose to fully love you when you cant even open up and try to fulfill my midget fantasy
Things I woke up with this morning: half a mcmuffin, orange hair, one shoe and a friendly german man. Tequila was a brilliant idea.
Dude, please wake him up, there are pills all over the floor and hes the only one who knows which ones to take simultaneously.
there's chocolate cake in my bathtub.. I don't even want to know how the hell chocolate cake wound up in my tub..
Come find me, I'm the girl sitting alone in taco bell at 9 in the morning drinking concealed beer with a straw
NO I FORBID YOU. THERE ARE BETTER VIRGINITIES OUT THERE WORTH KIDNAPPING.
New discovery: pineapple flavored vodka. Life made, liver in jeopardy. Graduation t-minus 50 minutes.
Just blowing bubbles with my nipple rings in my shower.
You always make things weird.
I think god invented us with two hands so we can grab an ass and spank it at the same time.
note: just because the casino is called bourbon street, it doesn't mean you can puke and keep walking and no one will care. chalk me up for another 86
I don't know whether to laugh it off or be pissed at him..I got pulled over this morning leaving his place and the officer thought my hickeys were hand prints around my neck and asked if I needed to be escorted out of town.
like sometimes I wish I was allergic to latex so I wouldn't have sex with so many people..
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