Whod you bang
So I'm stoned for 420, and have an eye doctor appointment in fifteen minutes
Are your eyes okay
I mean if I was Asian they would be
if one more of _____'s family tells me "you're next" i'm going to shoot myself. Thank god for gin (most protestant phrase ever at the most Jewish wedding ever)
Ask for a julep and start talking about how you much prefer the uncircumsized peen. that should probably stop them.
he puts the penis in happiness.
getting your period on valentines day is like an extra little fuck you, now you REALLY have no chance of sex tonight.
My choices this week make me realize that I need to copyright the term "cock buffet"
There's a high school volleyball camp on campus this summer. I'm definitely going to jail.
Sorry I didn't take you making out with him all night as a hint you wanted nothing to do with him...
casual night just sitting in the kitchen at 2 am eating stale chips and hot sauce while my friends younger sister is cleaning all the blood off my body
I bought new panties to console myself ... you know, because I am going to lose my ovaries. Well, if I don't die of a heart attack first. But at least when the EMS folks find me, I'll be finely dressed from the waist down.
All I remember is laying in that secret hideaway closet, naked, with a beer cowboy hat on and you walking in and sitting down crying because no one would have sex with you
Can't decide if this guy is hot or if I'm just bored.
Sex is clearly the solution either way.
Compositionally, that's actually a really nice picture.
And your penis looks really nice too.
I would throw a dart into the Olympic ceremony and fuck whoever it hit
You have my heart. You only share my vagina.
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