Speaking of school, I've done the math and I get laid about 10 times more often than I did before I got my law degree. $100,000 well spent.
I dinstinctly remember making out to "I believe I can fly" and waving my arms like a bird to the beat.
I really like you, but I want to get to know you on a time when I am not at drugs.
I'm shutting down my vagina temporarily...it's like the last two weeks were a going out of business sale...and now it needs a break...
I'm having a staring contest with a raccoon.
Where the hell are you
He's winning.
tell your freshman friends. will trade sexual favors for swipes. ive got dinner tomorrow open and lunch on wed
I'm sorry, you might have to start setting aside some time in your day for my pussy.
I will keep you posted and someday if we daydrink teach you how to do a footjob
I JUST MADE OUT WITH A BRITISH SOCCER PLAYER. LONG LIVE THE QUEEN. GOD BLESS THAT COUNTRY.
WHY AM I CRAWLING IN OLDER MEN HOLY JESUS
I reek of vagina.. My cab driver commented.
Just burnt my tongue. Not sure if it will help or hurt giving blow jobs
The number of threesomes I have agreed to seems to increase every time I talk to you drunk...
A black cat walked my drunken ass home last night and made sure I made it back into the apartment safe. Sat with me for 30 minutes as I struggled to unlock the door. Guardian angel or drunken hallucinations?
4 of us. Guys and girls. Were sitting there discussing the passed out half naked Brit girl on the floor. She is no longer the international woman of mystery.
Randomize
