Can we end it on a good note at least? Can we fuck and then never talk again?
I will fuck him senseless, no need for a priest.
I only have one eye to read your texts because I just stabbed one out after reading that last text.
well the night couldnt get much worse after she peed all over herself and the sidewalk.
It's called the eyeliner-blowjob correlation, read a science book bro
I dont even think your gonna like what I got you for christmas. If not we can take it back and get drugs.
I am a 5'4" ball of sexual frustration and vodka. It is that kind of night.
He was making Jim beam nachos. Chips soaked in whiskey with cheese
did i make more ranch sandwiches last night
you had 4
I'll have to start mass sending dong pics to get the recognition I deserve
My dad is blowing up my phone with pictures from the midget wrestling match.
I wanna trust fall face first on a penis.
WEED BROWNIES! He put weed in my brownie mix! And he got it from YYYYOOOOUUUU!
Look at the bright side mom. After 20 years dad is still capable of surprising you!
Shut up Max.
I need an outfit for the bar tmrw that reads I have daddy issues and would like a fancy sugar daddy.
he told me I was hypnotizing him with my mouth so I guess I do give good head
Greetings from Florida; the armpit of the US, where my 240something lb brother nearly got carried away by some aggressive woodland mosquitoes. I was only spared because they could probably sense I was currently semi-disassociating and would not feel the suffering their presence wrought.
Anyway, how was your day?
Randomize
