Girl in front of me has spent the class alternating between playing farmville and the tiffany's website looking at engagement rings. Every once in a while she holds her hand up to the screen.
She doesn't deserve the breathe the same air that we do.
She just bought a cow and we've moved on to looking at wedding dresses.
Yeah, my mom walked in on us. Instead of yelling, she went and hid in the bathroom til we finished. It was pretty classy.
Can I get a DUI with a shopping cart? I've nearly hit 2 displays and little girl...
let's get a trip to cabo together for next spring... they have to have forgotten about me by now
should my break up email to my English professor be in MLA format?
your drunk mistake has arrived...he is the one wearing a poncho
btw theres a pine tree in the downstairs shower. the guys thought it would be a great free air freshener.
we're like Indians of the 21st century. trading not for food and survival but personal gain and by trouble you mean getting daytime drunk and going to the roller ring then yes.
I had such a pleasant walk of shame. The sun was shining, I smiled at all the high school suckers who judged me on their way to school, and I made friends with an old guy and his dog.
Well it's been 24 hours and I still feel like a mammoth sat on my balls
We were destined to go to rehab together
Everyone heard you scream that I was to be naked, in your bed in 5 minutes. We were one hell of a shitshow spectacle
Smoking a bowl in nothing but a flamingo thong.
I really need to get to the point where I can poop at his house. I’ve taken three shits on the way home already.
shots, cocks, socks. bingo
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