He's so far in the closet he's in Narnia
what's the vibe there?
extraordinary amounts of gine
just bought a 30 and sold it for $2 a can to some dumb ass high school kids. now lets buy two and get really drunk
No. I do not want to discuss your lesbian tendencies with my sister.
She still started it.
So, I was thinking... Since this restraining order doesn't go into affect until monday, that leaves us 5 days to wreck his world.
I think my hand is broken. But his nose definitely is
I was going to say I needed the exercise but now all I can think about is BJs
My work here is done
I'm drinking and working out! I'm bench pressing the beer pong table and doing push ups and lifting the chair.
I'm going to try and loofah my hangover away.
Update: It didn't work
I literally cut myself out of my pants. What is my life.
Also, do you have any insight as to WHY I have a note saved from the 17th of June that reads *clears throat*, "you got that swanky blues libido"
while on the topic of showers...why is there apple juice in our bathtub?
Life is clearly unfair. You remember Courtney has three older sisters, well they're all "make baby sister look like a four" hot. I knew I shouldn't go home with her.
Do plants get herpes?
who is this
I'm really sorry I called you a "smug, arrogant, boyfriend-fucking piece of defecation". I was super drunk.
I was going to be mad, but then I remembered you don't use autocorrect and spelled everything correctly and I was kinda impressed.
Randomize
