I cant video chat with you tonight, my parents are home
r u implying that im some kind of v-chat prostitution whore?
I just ate a whole pineapple for lunch. You should be begging to give me a bj tonight.
oh great, iTunes now thinks im gay.
She started to rub her ass on my shoulder and i instantly thought "i am going to get E. Coli"
My ex best friend's ex fuck buddy is visiting. There was no other option but day drinking.
I asked you if you needed a ride and you kept saying "no, my name is katelyn"
I got laughed at by a homeless guy in a Daniel Boone hat. I have no clue what this means for my day
Uh yeah can we get an age of consent check on Dave's penis?
Age of consent, Dave's penis. Thank you...
How are you not embarrassed to know me. I'm a mess right now. I'm a walking, talking tornado of embarrassment
do i respond to the booty call for the guy with the bigger dick or the one who has the gourmet coffee i like so much? at this point i'm leading toward the coffee
We should try to put a bagel on your penis
Ick. That's not even the fun kind of punishment.
I HAVE TOO MICH DICK TALKING TO ME IDK WHAT TO DO.
I just want to get drunk and not have to worry about you leaving me at the bar.
Don’t fucking talk to that dude from monday!! Ethical consumption dude, don’t fuck shitty guys
Randomize