He yelled GOOOOAAAALLL when he came.
Milquetoast, coolest word ever.
Come over! I've just turned Titanic into a drinking game. I drink every time I want to fuck Leonardo DiCaprio.
Call 911 I'm faking my own death so this fat chick leaves my room
Why did I think it was so necessary to steal that rolling pin?
Brought 2 entire pizzas with to the bar, everyone loves us
I really hope the fuck ferry pays me a visit to close out 2011 properly.
I'm the brains and you're the boobs of this operation.
I told you, I'm taking a sledgehammer to your walls. Fuck your walls.
I'm Batman.
If I'm not drunk and wearing a penguin hat by the time we are done opening Christmas presents then coming home for Christmas was a complete failure
he played intl players anthem 4me and ate a strawberry out of my pussy
After you smoke one night. Just whisper in a barely audible voice, "Grey Poupon"
Your penis is the destroyer of worlds.
I just drunkenly accidentally had sex with my boss
Did you at least ask for a raise?
No but I am now the owner of one of either his or his roomate's teeshirts... Maybe I can use it to negotiate?
What does it mean when the bartender gives you 4 straws?
Randomize
