i just posted a lake picture of you with a dead fish in your mouth. happy july 5th.
Words of wisdom-never eat a peanut-butter covered banana on a construction site ever again
We were playing flip cup on the nice dining room table. Losing team had to shamwow the table in between rounds
did i have both of my shoes on when the bouncer threw us out last night?
Listen, what he fails to understand is that the Olive Garden does not equal pussy.
I had to ask him for the scissors while I was in the shower. My hood piercing was stuck in my loofah.
Fran... I put my tongue in somebody's gage hole last night.
I thought monday through wednesday was a YOLO free zone.
I have vodka and a slip n slide so of you could come over that would be great
fuck whipped cream. I'd eat vegetables off those abs
She ordered an O'douls. That was the end of that date
I just got a lecture from your coked out sister about the monetary value of Dothraki hair braids. Take her home.
I feel like I hate him but his dick too bomb to hate completely
Star Wars means nothing to me. I know only the basics. Darth is Luke's father. R2 is short, C3 is gold. Yoda sings Rainbow Connection. The kinda stuff EVERYONE knows.
I really hope this is just a phase, because I am not capable of carrying both of our drunken whore asses through life. Too much dead weight....
Randomize
